Starring Ana de Armas, Chris Evans, and Adrien Brody, directed by Dexter Fletcher, and written by Rhett Reese, Paul Wernick, and Chris McKenna.
After watching Ana and Chris go head-to-head in Knives Out, I was excited to see them together again in a feature film. But, I was quickly put into place by the lackluster script that made this film hard to watch.
Let’s get to the point.
Much of the dialogue was so cringey that it made me crinkle my face. This was not a crinkle of laughter or enjoyment, but a crinkle of “get me out of here”. If I was watching this film in the movie theater, I likely would have left before it was over. Or, I would have gotten up to visit the bathroom, the snack counter, and take pictures by whatever movie cardboard cutouts were in the theater halls.
I don’t like to be negative about films, I can imagine how much work goes in behind-the-scenes, from the script, to pre-production, to editing, and everything else that makes a film possible. However, when a script and story feels lazy, I think it’s ok to say something. As a writer myself, I know how hard it can be to get people to give your story a chance, even after you have spent months or years working to perfect it. So when I see a less than mediocre script get produced and cast with A-list stars, it reminds me that maybe one day someone will give my scripts a chance after all.
Sorry, Captain
I love Captain America, he is probably my favorite Avenger. But Chris Evans is not Captain America, he is the actor who plays Captain America. Even then, I do not think any cast would have been able to make this film a hit. The script is too bland and has too many weaknesses. But, I do think they could have cast people that had better chemistry than Chris and Ana. Some of the acting was hard to watch, which I found surprising because I have seen Ana’s and Chris’ films before and I generally enjoy them.
If I had to recast this film, I would have chosen Bill Skarsgard and Florence Pugh, or Haley Lu Richardson. Ana’s accent was hard to understand sometimes, and I was left wondering what she said. But after seeing Blonde, I understand why she does roles that allow her to keep her accent. Even when she does an American accent, her natural accent still peaks through a lot.
Honesty Hour
Overall, if I knew nothing about the actors and did not know this film was bought by AppleTV+, I would have guessed that this was a film student’s first film. No shame in that, everyone starts somewhere. But considering the huge budget, the cast, and the well-known writers, I was left a bit confused at how this movie could be so…. (I’m sorry) bad.
Cole (Chris Evans) has bad flirting game. It was so bad that I feel like Chris might share this trait with his character, because some lines of dialogue made my ears want to go on vacation. In contrast with Cole’s apprehensive nature, Sadie (Ana de Armas) is a strong woman, which is one of the best things about this movie. The fact that it’s assumed that a man is behind all of the big moves and genius, when it’s really been Sadie’s maneuvers all along is realistic. But everything else in between is lacking depth. Everything from the plot, characters, dialogue and action feels like it was quickly thrown together in the back of a car and not planned out with care.
The soundtrack also screamed, “Pick me!” While there were some good tunes, it felt like the editors were trying to make up for the boring writing and acting by putting popular music in the background. Also, the cameos by Anthony Mackie (Grandson of Sam) and Sebastian Stan (God) felt fun in the moment, but are the perfect example of how this movie includes so scenes not imperative to the story and that do not enhance it in anyway. Their cameos were not meaningful, they just happened. Fluff, per se, and not the good kind. Many scenes could have been cut, condensed, or rewritten to make the pace and story flow better. Ryan Reynolds’ (Jonas) cameo was faster and blended more into the story than the others.
Best/Worst Quote
Cole boasts, “You know that power you felt? It’s from the land.” (This quote almost triggered my gag reflex.)
Cole has a moment of reason: “Protecting the people you love is never a mistake.”
My Rating: 4/10
While I did, at first, find the scene in the tunnels semi-humorous because it showed Cole’s many weaknesses, it went on for too long. I get the point: Sadie is the powerhouse and Cole is helpless and out of his element. She is the tiger and he is the rabbit (in more ways than one). Cole’s instinct is to not harm other living things and Sadie is trained to be in defense mode.
In the end, I wanted more emotion. I wanted to believe the story, the characters, their ever-changing feelings for each other, but I found it hard to get through the two hour film. The characters did not feel real to me. I did not feel the deeper tension the character’s kept talking about, or feel like a room was necessary (lol).
Sentence Summary
When Sadie meets her opposite, Cole, they get along for 24-hours and then realize how little they have in common.
Where you can watch it:
It’s only available to watch on AppleTV+, but I would skip it and watch The Last Thing He Told Me instead.
Aloha Arianna 